Crossing the Threshold: An Irish Woman’s Journey Through Perimenopause

mariannegunnigan
Jun 2
3 min read

“Perimenopause is not the end — it’s a powerful beginning.”

Perimenopause — the often misunderstood, rarely discussed chapter in a woman’s life — is a threshold. It is the space between the full bloom of reproductive vitality and the steady wisdom of post-menopause. It’s unpredictable, emotional, messy, and — if we allow it — empowering.

In Ireland, where women’s health has historically been whispered about rather than shouted, perimenopause is finally making its way into the national conversation. But for many, it remains a solitary, confusing transition. This post is a call for visibility, solidarity, and pride in the power of the change.

Redefining Identity: Who Are You Becoming?

For decades, many of us have been defined by roles — mother, caregiver, partner, worker, friend. Our value, especially in a still-traditional society like Ireland, is often measured by how much we give, how well we nurture, and how little we complain.

Perimenopause disrupts that. Your body stops cooperating. Your mind rebels. Your emotions speak up loudly and demand attention.

This can be a time of deep questioning:

What do I want now — not what I’ve always done?
Who am I without fertility, or the ability (or expectation) to bear children?
What dreams have I buried under the weight of obligation?

These questions are not signs of crisis. They are invitations to come home to yourself.

Cultural Silence and the Irish Experience

In Ireland, perimenopause has traditionally been cloaked in silence. Generations of women coped quietly, often suffering in isolation. It’s only in recent years — thanks to advocacy, media attention, and brave voices on platforms like The Irish Menopause — that this conversation is being normalised.

Still, stigma lingers. A 2022 survey by The Menopause Hub found that three in four women in Ireland felt unprepared for menopause.

The Physical and Emotional Rollercoaster

Perimenopause doesn’t arrive with fanfare. It tiptoes in: your periods change, your sleep becomes restless, or your emotions feel unrecognisable.

Common symptoms include:

Irregular, heavy, or skipped periods
Hot flashes and night sweats
Mood swings, anxiety, or irritability
Brain fog and memory lapses
Sleep disruption
Joint pain and fatigue
Weight gain, especially around the middle
Changes in libido
Vaginal dryness and urinary issues

“Perhaps the most disorienting symptom is feeling unlike yourself.”

Liberation from the Male Gaze

As estrogen declines, so too can the intensity of our social conditioning. For many women, perimenopause marks a turning point — a time when pleasing others takes a back seat, and self-honouring moves to the front.

This often comes with a kind of quiet freedom from the male gaze.

You may stop dressing for approval, stop apologising for taking up space, or stop tolerating dynamics that drain you.

The Medical System and Irish Challenges

One of the most common struggles for women in perimenopause is finding the right support. Many GPs are undertrained in menopause care, leading to misdiagnoses or dismissals.

But Ireland is making progress. There are now six public menopause clinics, and increasing access to HRT and specialised care.

Keep going. You deserve answers, and you are not alone.

Support in Ireland: You're Not Alone

Here are trusted resources for Irish women navigating perimenopause:

🟢 The Irish Menopause – Facebook Group
🟢 The Menopause Hub
🟢 The Midlife Women Rock Project
🟢 HRT & Me
🟢 HSE Menopause Clinics

Creating Ritual and Meaning in Midlife

In many Indigenous and ancient cultures — including our own Celtic heritage — midlife was seen as a sacred initiation. It wasn’t feared. It was celebrated.

Ways to mark this transition:

Journal or write a letter to your younger self
Share your journey with friends, sisters, daughters
Plant something — symbolic of rebirth
Light a candle and reflect on your transformation

A Note on HRT and Natural Options

HRT is safe and effective for many. But it’s not one-size-fits-all.

Supportive strategies include:

Nutrition and gut support
Strength training and walking
Mindfulness, journaling, or meditation
CBT or counselling
Magnesium, Vitamin D, Omega-3s
Herbal therapies like ashwagandha or sage

Empowerment is about informed choice — not fear.

Final Words: This Is Not the End

Perimenopause is not a fall from grace. It’s not the beginning of decline. It’s the beginning of a deeper, more rooted self.

You are not becoming less. You are becoming more — more YOU.

Let’s break the silence. Let’s share our stories. Let’s lift each other through the shift and help ensure that the generations of women that follow us are better informed and empowered to embrace this next chapter of their womanhood.